Tag Archive | trusting God

God’s up to Something Big

The streets are filled with violence,
Wrongs committed on every side,
A thirst for justice for everyone,
Disillusioned cries it can’t be done,
But, wait! There’s a rainbow—
God is up to something big.

Countries torn apart by war,
Innocent victims of terrorism,
One’s who’ve only known fear,
Who’ve hurt so much barely a tear,
But, wait! There’s a rainbow—
God is up to something big.

We may not understand right now,
What God protects us from,
Especially because our human eyes,
Cannot see where we’ve been freed,
But, wait! There’s a rainbow–
God is up to something big!

His fingerprints are literally everywhere,
His Spirit speaking to every heart,
Reminders of His promise to us,
How He loves us, oh so much.
See it there? There’s a rainbow,
God is doing something big!

                        dfav 8/11/16

—Donna

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The Road is Tough

Don’t let me give up.

Don’t let me give in.

Yes, this road is tough,

But I’d travel it again.

There is a reason,

Though I may not know,

But God who is wiser,

Leads me where I go.

Lord, here’s my will,

Lord, here’s my heart,

When the going toughest

We won’t be apart.

Don’t let me give up,

Don’t let me give in,

Lord, keep me fighting,

‘Cause evil cannot win.

                              dfav 8/4/16

—Donna

Cottage-by-the-Sea, #12, 7/29/16

Abba Father:

You are the Lord God Almighty, 

Knowing every hair upon my head,

As You know each grain of sand,

Swept to and fro by every wave,

Like every breeze off the ocean grand.

You are my loving Abba, my God.

Praises to You forevermore for who You are.

Security lived in this sweet assurance,

Keeps me content with what I have.

Though the world might mock me,

A life built upon the Rock stands,

For Jesus is the Cornerstone come see,

On sunny days or storms He stays,

There is no God but Him.

Let our ears tune to hear His voice,

The faintest whisper to our hearts,

Focusing hard upon staying true to Him,

So our feet may not falter again,

When life’s sorrows make the Son dim,

His truth is still the absolute,

Hold on until the storm breaks.

                               dfav 7/29/16

—Donna

I’m Not a Betting Woman

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The situation isn’t pretty,
Thinking of it fills me with dread,
In Vegas the odds would weigh heavy,
The next few days are already read.
But, see, I’m not a betting woman,
Don’t believe in luck at all,
I’m already on my knees and praying,
God won’t let us tumble and fall.
Life, yes, it’s unpredictable, I agree,
Bad things happen to everyone,
But lucky numbers, shoes and hats?
Make no difference under the sun.
That’s why, I’m no betting woman,
Don’t believe in luck at all,
I’m already on my knees and praying,
God hears me when I call.
Go ahead and place your bets,
Wage money, silver and gold,
Place your trust in mediums,
Then watch ’til all the story unfolds.
Me? I’ll remain right steady,
No bets, no consultation, no luck at all,
I trust in the power of prayer,
To the Lord God who loves us all.
No, I’m not a betting woman,
Who cares what the odds are today?
But, I’m on my knees, the truth is set,
God and faith, they don’t play.
dfav 9/28/15
-Donna

Daughter, I Ask

Photo source unknown.
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Daughter I ask,
Throw open windows to the breath of Truth,
Eliminate your heart of all the shadows,
Ask Me to melt away sins chains,
To flood your soul with Sonshine,
While praying your heart is refreshed with Holy rain.

Dare allow Me to light each nook and cranny,
My Spirit’s swirling to blow away cobwebs,
While your neglected shelves have order returned,
Recognize My power when you but ask,
In My will is much for which you’ve always yearned.

Daughter, how I love you so much!
With love deeper and truer than any man.
Don’t leave while things are halfway restored.
Trust me and I will show you the way,
With steps sure and true, ones not easily ignored.
             dfav 9/24/15

From the Cottage by the Sea 10-31-14

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Abba Father,

There’s a storm off the coast

Been brewing there for hours

Winds have been picking up

Seagulls surf on air currents

Fish churn up with the waves

I’ve sat here amazed by Your power.

 

High tide is rolling in

Waves beat up the shore

Seaweed dances onto rocks

Salt stings my face in the mist

Sand blasts the cottage rocks

Your power shows forever more.

 

It occurs to me Abba

I’ve brewed off the coast myself

Acting out just like this storm

Flexing my muscles showing out

As if it proves I’m tough

But You know the truth Yourself.

 

But, how can You expect a thank You?

This life isn’t what I thought I’d lead

No where did I foresee this and

Yes, Lord, I’ve been sad and angry

Like the storm off the coast

What warning didn’t I heed?

 

Then one thought surfs on in

To thank You in every circumstance

To be content with where and who I am

To be grateful for what I do and don’t have

To pray without ceasing for every need

Then my storm creates a dance.

 

Thank You Lord for where You’ve led me

For the valleys, the mountains, the waves

Thank You God for the time of struggle

For the darkness and the silence

Thank You Abba Father for teaching me

Surrendering my will is what saves.

 

Help me move on now Lord

To focus on the sun behind the storm

For life with You as the center

To cling to You while walking free

‘Cause this is how I live for You

And You give me a way to no longer mourn.

    d.f.a.v. 10/30/14

Amen

—Donna

 

 

 

 

Unexpected Blessings

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God blessed me yesterday
In quite the unexpected way
In a way I did not pray
Except meet my needs today.

Often when I go to Him
What I know is very slim
Like diving off and I can’t swim
I trust in God not my whims.

When the pain is very deep
Or the road is rough and steep
A promise made they cannot keep
Tears withheld for I cannot weep.

Undeserved and far from just
He graces me with His trust
Answers prayers in joyful busts
Gives me treasure that cannot rust.

Today a physical blessing did arrive
Tomorrow’s answer will surely thrive
Blessings for which I haven’t strived
That come from the God so alive.

Unexpected answers sweet and true
Thank You Abba for all You do
The answer today a message from You
Your gift every morning is mercy new.
          d.f.a.v. 7-8-14
–Donna

What Do We Say

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A teenager comes to you
Bruises on her arm
Dislocated shoulder
It’s not the first time
Her mother did her harm.
You can call social services
Follow all protocol
When she asks why God
Didn’t stop her abuser
Answers seem so small.

On missions overseas
A woman tearfully explains
If she accepts Christ
An infidel a traitor
And worse she’ll be named
Her husband will beat her
He & her father might
Stone her to death
Will God protect her
When rocks pound her tonight?

A man lives in pain
Every single day
Relief never comes
Just why he’s in agony
The doctors can’t say
He hurts so much
He’s losing touch
Answer him one thing
Will God heal him?
He needs it so much.

What do you answer
In situations with such need
You can’t promise rescue
Or protection or discount
God’s power to intercede.
But you don’t have answers
Beyond God gave man free will
And we’re capable of evil
An violence against others
A truth that rages still.

In the entanglement
Of mankind’s affairs
We can be sure
God surely weeps
God does surely care
Man has free will
To do as he may choose
To live with God
As his standard
Or toss it all to lose.

How do you explain
Intense poverty and hunger
Senseless violence or abuse
Needless acts of evil
Painful ends of man’s anger?
How do you answer
Why one cry the tide doesn’t turn
Or a hundred souls
Are violently silenced
And it’s the Bible they burn?

God is alive and well
He’s working everyday
He is not weak
Nor does He forget
The prayers that we pray
The evil in man’s hearts
With free will to reign
Will always cause our questions
Sometimes crush the innocent
Oh so often bring the pain.

It isn’t that God forgets
Or doesn’t send the truth
Or leaves us unprotected
When evil is prevailing
And Satan’s on the loose.
But how He acts
And when He moves
They aren’t our decision
Our choice is to
Trust or not the
Eternity in God’s wisdom.
d.f.a.v. 6-24-14
–Donna

The Lord will Provide

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There are two dreams I’ve held in my heart for as long as I can remember.  There have been other dreams as well but they’ve either been realized or I cut my losses and rowed on.  But these two dreams I have always believed I will go down with them in the boat rather than give them up,

The dream today on my restless heart, troubling my spirit is my dream to be a published author of Christian fiction.  Along with this I dream of being successful enough at the craft that readers laugh out loud, cheer the characters on, wish they could live in this book’s world, find godly inspiration for their own life and cry when someone dies or grieves before the last word is read.  These are the types of books that have fed my soul through nearly 50 years. 

I can’t write the Bible, I can use its lessons to help characters overcome life’s obstacles.  I dream my fiction writing turns readers towards Jesus and the Bible.

This has been my dearest, most treasured dream.  And at last God has set before me the opportunity to really focus on my writing.  I have the time.  I have the technology, resources, life experience and a published author who is willingly mentoring me.

I am blowing it!

Right out of the gate I have gotten cold feet.  I’m flat out scared.

If God allows me this desire of my heart I can never go back to finding some sense of okayness with looking at the dream through a telescope.  People are going to expect me to write another novel and then another and what if I can’t?

If  in allowing me this opportunity and I am not good at it, if all I find are rejection letters in my mailbox what then?

Afraid to fail.  Afraid to succeed. 

My study in the Book of John in the New Testament this week has begun with chapter 6, verses 1-15.  Today I was focusing on verses 5-9 a lot.  “When Jesus looked up and saw a great crowd coming toward him, he said to Philip, ‘Where shall we buy bread for these people to eat?’  He asked this only to test him, for he already had in mind what he was going to do.  Philip answered him, ‘Eight months wages would not buy enough bread for each to have one bite!’  Another of his disciples, Andrew, Simon Peter’s brother, spoke up.  ‘Here is a boy with five small barley loaves and two small fish, but how far will they go among so many?’ ”

There are four people in this section of scripture and four viewpoints on how to solve the problem.  Let’s start with the boy whose name is unknown to us.  Someone, either his mother or a sister or perhaps himself packed the boy a lunch before he went to find Jesus.  No doubt, he was in a hurry, afraid he couldn’t catch up with the others following this man of miracles.  Yet his part in this passage is vital.  He provided the “little” Jesus would turn into “much”.  No doubt he believed Jesus needed the lunch more than he did for he showed or told Andrew about his food.  The boy knew it wasn’t much but he knew Jesus could use it.

Now for Philip.  Philip looked at the crowd numbering over 5000 (see verse 10) men, women and children and saw the cost of feeding them even one bite.  To be fair Jesus did ask him where they should buy bread but Jesus didn’t ask Philip how much money it would cost.  Philip saw the need but before thinking of where to get enough bread to feed the crowd Philip was seeing money signs.  He was calculating the average daily wage time the cost of a loaf of bread times the number of people and after eight months he was throwing up his hands saying it couldn’t be done.

Andrew’s view matches that of the little boy a bit more than Philip’s.  At least Andrew makes some effort to meet the need.  He knew they needed food and that is what he inquired about.  His inquires didn’t seem to amount to much in his viewpoint though.  Five small barley loaves and two small fishes would barely feed the boy, much less thousands of people.  Still he tells Jesus of what the boy has offered.

The most important viewpoint is that of Jesus.  He only asked Philip where bread could be bought to test him.  Jesus already knew what He was going to do.  Jesus had been preparing to meet this need long before the crowd gathered to follow Him.

What test did Philip fail?  What test did Andrew fail?  Though they both saw the need neither of them had faith enough that Jesus could meet that need.  They witnessed Jesus turn water into wine but they didn’t remember that well enough to even pause and think, “Maybe I should ask Jesus what He has planned.”

Much like me, I thought, this morning.  I see the need.  I see the opportunity.  I am not trusting Jesus to meet my need.

But He will.  If I succeed it will be by His guidance and inspiration and provision.  If I fail He will give me a new dream.

I must be like the boy in the scripture above, I must bring my little and turn it over to Jesus to make it into much.  Nor can I forget God has it worked out already, my needs He is preparing to supply.  In Genesis 22:13-14 the Hebrew name for God is Jehovah-Jireh, meaning “The Lord will provide”.  I must trust He will.

God’s blessings upon you,

–Donna

Water and Jesus

If any one thing in nature draws me it is water. Lakes, ponds, creeks, rivers, streams, swimming pools and oh, my, the OCEAN! There is some part of me that feels as if I’ve settled in at the most natural place in the world when I am by water. That is saying a lot for a woman who:

  1. …cannot swim.
  2. …didn’t even see the ocean until she was almost 25-years-old.
  3. …who hated trying to walk on sand.
  4. …who can’t fathom the ordeal of trying my wheelchair on a beach.
  5. …who rarely is around water, except in the bathroom and kitchen.
  6. …who is terrified of water in my face, much less over my head.

My fear of water stems from having my hair washed as a child while standing at the kitchen sink. Regardless of how far I stretched over the sink or how tightly I squeezed my eyes shut nothing could stop the unpredictable flood of water on my face. Locked into position by my mother’s turning of my head and repeated reprimands I was helpless to do much but hope it ended quicker every single time and fight to control my panic. Since I was the genetic recipient of oily type hair it required washing daily. My mother insisted on washing my hair herself until I was entering the sixth grade. By my calculations that is around 3600 hair washings, although I probably should reduce it to 3500 for the first year I was alive and my hair hadn’t quite grown in yet. So 3500 times I experienced what felt like I was drowning.

As I got older I understood I wasn’t going to drown when my mother dumped countless containers of water on my head, but as a young child, I didn’t have that awareness and by the time I was older the fear was deeply engrained in me. Sadly it couldn’t be washed out. Hence my love/hate relationship with water.

It is such a fear that when I accepted Christ at the age of fourteen I couldn’t bring myself to join the church at the same time because it meant being completely submerged in running water. We did it the way our ancestors had for centuries, we gathered by a creek bank and waded in, the preacher and you got into your places and you held your nose closed with his hand over yours and he lowered you completely under the water. Now because the closest creek with running water that was accessible couldn’t boast of being very deep under normal conditions our church had to wait until we had a big rain. The creek would swell immensely, overflow its banks and our deacons would keep an eye on it for that perfect Sunday it was clear and deep enough for baptism, then in we’d go. I was having no part of it for it looked like torture to me.

Eventually the pastor and my parents wore my resistance down. I consented and one July Sunday afternoon I was among those who waded into the creek, dressed in a dress because we weren’t allowed to wear pants to any church service, and my mind was far from anything holy. I wasn’t even capable of praying. Never had a man looked so physically incapable of being able to prevent dropping me in the water or not being able to pull me back up as our pastor did as I took his hand in the middle of that flood swollen creek with its racing waters. When I went under panic rose inside me and had the immersion taken any longer than a few seconds I probably would have drown myself fighting to get up and away. I doubted my salvation experience as being real for years because my baptism was so emotionally traumatic, yet I never told another living soul.

From the first time I saw the ocean, beneath the headlights of a van at night it was only black and white but my love for it burst forth. Especially in the darkness the power of the ocean was so immense, so powerful I could not question the mightiness of God in His creation. A couple days later I would see it for the first time in “color” and the mission group I was with had to drag me off the beach for they were all frozen from the winter temperatures and ocean breezes while I didn’t even realize I was numb from cold.

Now though I could sit by the ocean, especially in winter when it is practically deserted, for endless days and even nights. The crashing or lapping of the ocean waves becoming the heartbeat of my being, the breeze off the ocean sweeping all the ugliness away and the call of the sea gulls tempting me to flight. Once I can psych myself up enough to get into a swimming pool I never want to get out, the water giving me a physical freedom of movement I don’t have on dry land. Though I was never brave enough to cross the large boulders into the raging river in the Great Smoky Mountains I certainly longed to with nearly everything within me and sitting beside its banks my heart leaps in my chest and my eyes lift toward Heaven.

One other experience with water has blossomed my love for water. I was so sick, my body so ravaged by infection the flesh was falling off of my left leg, and I was barely aware I was still on this planet but I wanted a drink of water. I’d been begging, every time I rose to a point of consciousness, for a drink since I’d been taken into the emergency room. How many hours passed I can’t tell you but it seemed as if I were suspended between this world and the other where there was no time, I just existed between the two places. I opened my eyes and couldn’t see more than a foot from my bed but I sensed I wasn’t alone and I again begged for a drink of water. This time the person with me said she’d be right back with it. I struggled to stay conscious long enough for that drink but again slipped under. Awaking again my question was, “Where’s my water”? Before I had another thought I was unconscious again.

Then I was being lifted right out of my hospital bed and I pushed to awaken myself for it wasn’t that I was being lifted by nurses or orderlies as it was done in a hospital. Instead someone had their arms under me, one beneath my knees and one under my shoulders and was literally lifting me up in his arms. First I thought my husband had gone crazy but when my eyes opened I was no longer in that hospital bed, I was no longer in that hospital. Above me gentle sunlight played hide and seek with the most beautiful green leaves that just seemed to simmer and glow and branches of a large tree that seemed as old as time. I felt arms tighten around me, my head was pressed to someone’s chest, right at the heart and I knew beneath my ear the heartbeat of Jesus was beating.

Immediately I became aware of the sound of rushing water and as I was carried toward the sound I was able to see a river so wide the banks of the other side were only visible when we were in the water. The rivers waters were running swiftly, I could hear that, I sensed that, but when I looked at it the transparent silvery water, a water I’d never seen before and haven’t seen since its surface was smooth as silk. It was as if it was liquid silver yet you could see through it as clearly as any creek or river I’ve ever seen before. I knew we were going in that water and regardless of how beautiful it was, I remembered I was afraid of water.

“I should be afraid!” I thought.

But before the thought completely slipped through my mind Jesus replied, “It’s okay Faye, I’ve got you.”

All semblance of fear left me. It was okay Jesus had me. Into that water we went and I could feel how deep it was by how quickly I became nearly submerged and still we went on until we came to a wide smooth boulder in the middle of the river. Jesus lay me so my head and shoulders rested on that rock and as the rest of me was bathed by those rushing waters He never let me go.

That was an experience I knew for nearly a week multiple times a day. I never had a thought of fear after the first time. I somehow knew not to look up into Jesus face and I wasn’t tempted to, I wasn’t tempted by any negative or bad thoughts there. I didn’t wonder if I would live or die. I was 100% surrendered to God. I had 100% absolute trust in Him. I didn’t question how He managed to carry me. I didn’t question where we were but wherever it was it was created by God and He shared it with me. I didn’t question anything. I just gave in to the experience.

Love for water floods my heart and there are days I wish I knew of a body of water that was wheelchair accessible so that I could just go and sit by it and watch it move. I love it. But I hate it still with that fear that never completely fades. Just this morning when I was washing my own hair and water rushed down over my face that panic and fear popped up.

I love God. He is never far from my thoughts, always there for me even when I am not there for Him, and we have a personal relationship. Yet…

I still mess things up, I sin, sometimes ON PURPOSE! I still don’t obey Him regardless of how much I profess to love Him because I want my own way! Is that not showing hate instead of love? I think so.

Conquering my fear of water, of drowning to be specific, is something I will never stop trying to get over. Neither is my disobedience to my Holy Father. One day I’ll be able to afford and be brave enough to take swimming lessons and I will find that freedom in the water more often and in a greater way than ever before. One day I’ll cross another river and be Home and experience God as never before.

Meanwhile…

It’s okay Jesus has me!

–Faye