Tag Archive | living with a chronic illness

Going Back to Move Ahead – #2

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Defined by roles.

By what one does.

The jobs…

Tasks…

To do lists…

Successes…

Failures.
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That’s all you know
Until…
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Even losing a leg,

Wasn’t enough.

Blood clots…

Infection…

Heart damage…

Lung scarring…

Spirit willing…

Flesh says no.

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No matter how you argue.

It is no…

 

You’re lost again.

Without a career.

Uncertain…

Abnormal…

Physically unable…

Home based…

Spirit wounds.
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Count your blessings.

You do…
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Still able to drive.

Mind works fine.

It takes longer…

You get it done…

Disability approved…

Family stands strong…

God has moved.

 

You find value in being,

His daughter…

     d.f.a.v. 10/26/14

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–Donna

Going Back to Move Ahead – Beginning

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That indescribable swoosh –

Belt pelting through loops –

The hard sharp slap of leather

    Doubled on leather –

Split seconds of cowering wait –

Then the sounds have no words…

Silent screams of a bewildered child

Trust forever always gone-

Angry demands to break a spirit –

Secret welts and hidden bruises

Some deeper than could be healed.

 

That indescribable swoosh –

Air leaving lungs no return –

The faraway kind doctors words

    You’ll lose it –

Shattered hours of disbelief –

Echoes of a belt and internal screams…

Just when denial seems to work

Surely he had to be wrong –

Sirens stretchers emergency –

Another closer brush of deaths wings –

No more choice decision made

To live meant the leg must go.

 

That indescribable swoosh –

Of stretcher wheels and scrubs –

Silent seconds while deep sleep

    Comes to invade –

Until the next invasion slams –

Horrific pain disbelief leg gone…

Determination life must go on –

Return to home and work –

A higher mountain everyday

But one God helped me climb.

    d.f.a.v. 10/26/14

–Donna