Sometimes, Without Meaning To

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Sometimes, wthout meaning to…
I find life easier if I stay enclosed
Don’t go out…
Pass my time alone…
Or with family…
But mostly alone.
No one stares or whispers…
There’s no looks of pity…
No glance of disgust…
Or moment of judgment…
Arrogance doesn’t reign…
I am free just to be.

Sometimes, without meaning to…
I get lost in my world of pain…
My eyes see torrents of rain…
Or the raging winds…
And my life capsized…
Who I am lost at sea.
Though I determine to battle…
Praying God pulls me through…
‘Tis my burden each morning…
And that of my family…
Who would never admit…
What I cost them.

Sometimes, without meaning to…
The results are too much…
No solution seem sane…
The simpler gets passed…
I wonder if I lost my mind…
Along with my leg.
And the pathway laid out…
Seems incredibly cruel…
Terribly long and wild…
Awfully as if meant…
To torment me…
Though I know it can’t be.

Sometimes, without meaning to…
I forget to be thankful…
That I woke up breathing. ..
That I still have my mind…
My heart can still feel…
And God isn’t finished
With me just yet.
So I go to the rock…
I remember He is Abba…
No other God before Jehovah…
I call upon Jehovah-Raphael…
Elohim Ozer Li…
El Simchath Gili.

Sometimes without meaning to…
I find myself rejoicing…
My voice lifts in praise…
My heart is mended…
Eyes are opened…
And I live.
d.f.a.v. 5-27-14
In gratitude for today,
–Donna

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