I Found God Today

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Searched for You today
Your Spirit told me You were in Your Word
Ancient literature? Yes and no but more
The history of a Chosen People
And the record of we grafted in
By the blood of Christ.

Searched for You today
There You were during prayer
No formula. Simple talk with You.
A conversation between Father and daughter
And the awareness You are
But always a simple prayer away.

Searched for You today.
You peeked out at me from of all places
The stack of mail and one envelope
Reminder You are the Lord who will provide.
Thank You for providing
Thank You for being there.

Searched for You today
There You were in small comforts
A warm drink, my daughter’s smile
The comfort of my husband’s arms
The peace in the Scriptures
The fullness of You in Your time.
         D.f.a.v.   8/29/14

-Donna

From the Cottage by the Sea 8/26/14

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Dear Lord,
Quiet here in our Cottage by the Sea tonight
The moon and stars our only light
I lay and listen to the crashing sea
Wondering why You’ve said no to me.

Is it due to some secret sin I’ve committed?
Or some obedience I’ve omitted?
Does wickedness root itself inside
Or have I failed You on the outside?

The question haunts me day and night
Will you help to set me right?
After all the pain befallen me
This final cost seems too much to be.

Why me Lord, I want to beg to ask
Why give me this horrid task?
Then you look at me and say
You ask the wrong questions to light the way.

Ask instead why NOT you my child
Suffering comes without respect from great to mild.
As does mercy, love and grace
Can you allow My peace in this place?

I mourn a bit the things I’ve lost
Then remember Your complete cost.
Tomorrow morning the sun may rise
Turn my ears now from Satan’s lies.

Let me push beyond my expectations
And rise instead to the situation.
For Your no is not meant to be mean
It’s an example of glory yet to be seen.

The moon casts silver upon the floor
A light in the darkness to the door
The choice is now mine to make
Will I moan and groan, is my faith a fake?

Or will I trust in Your work and way
See Your love expressed in the no You say?
Be You my strength and confidence
You Lord, are my truest defense.
D.f.a.v. 8 / 26/14
-Donna

Heroes Today

Dedicated to all those struggling with physical,  emotional,  mental and spiritual challenges.   Do not give up, God is with us in this life and the next.
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They come in different -
…sizes
…ages
…genders
…social status’
…financial means.
Warriors against different -
…diseases
…illnesses
…addictions
…afflictions
…restrictions.
One set of heroes aren’t so different -
…in courage
…in determination
…in beliefs
…in strategies
…in long shots.
Their counterparts are different -
…parents
…doctors
…surgeons
…nurses
…lab technicians.
Both sets aren’t so different -
…but are often unseen
…underestimated
…overlooked
…undervalued
…unsung.
Their weapons are different -
…radiation
…dialysis
…chemotherapy
…transfusions
…foul medicines galore.
Their strength sources can be different. ..
…faith in God
…in prayer
…in love
…in family
…and friends support.
God bless these heroes differences…
…and similarities
…and faith
…and victories
…and endurance
…with “well done” at their finish lines.
               D.f.a.v. 8/24/14
–Donna

Your Spirit Wins

Abba Father,

Do heros ever give up?

Fight their last fight?

Put in a public appearance

So it appears all is right?

Do ordinary people give up?

Even those who believe in You?

Who keep on praying and

Keep on believing in what You do?

Do circumstances defeat?

Make success simply impossible?

After a while does life

Beat us down, make defeat acceptable?

You and I know it’s true

But that’s not where it ends.

For Your Spirit in our hearts survives

Faint perhaps but it will win.

    d.f.a.v. 8/22/14

–Donna

 

 

Catching Mama Up

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God blessed us with you, a godly mother
I’d never trade you for any other.
When you left us here on earth
Grief was then painfully birthed.
It’s been fifteen years now without you
Hard to believe life kept going then and now too.
Your Angel Boy Alex, how he thrives
Still our miracle he fights to survive.
Kimberly’s married to Scott with two kids of their own.
Shayna ‘ s seventeen our sunshine ’round home.
Cliff ‘s doing well with degrees galore
Debbie his wife so sweet, his support forevermore.
Deborah and Shane paramedics and firemen
Blessed with careers so suited for them.
Chris and I have a daughter too
I regret she never got to meet you.
Gene remarried but now he’s gone too
Ten years, six months from the day you flew.
Others too passed through deaths veil
Aunt Reba, Granny, Brenda, Uncle Calvin & Robert as well.
Cake decorating, oh, how its changed!
Electronic technology has come to reign.
As for your oldest, me, I’m hanging on today
Wish I could hear from you I’m doing okay.
There’s solace for me in my heart
That you’re with Jesus though we’re apart.
One day it’ll be my turn to go
The peace I have I pray our daughter then knows.
Until the day we again see eye-to-eye
I’ll keep hanging onto you and keep saying goodbye.

I love you Mama.
Shirley Fay Bishop Allred
January 1945 to August 20, 1999
              D.f.a.v. 8-20-14
–Donna

In Gratitude I Come to Pray

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In gratitude I come to pray
There cannot be any other way.
For easy to list are the wrongs
Those irritants that steal our song.
But in the midst of troubled steps
To cling to You saves from deeper depths.
Stay with me, please, my Friend
Our fellowship, it cannot end.
I’m thankful for each blessing You
Have shared to hold me fast and true.
Let each thought and word be right
In great love let me seek Your light.
Thank You Lord for each circumstance
That strengths me to go the distance
Without You Lord and the love You give
I could not thank You for this life I live.
And for my life, challenges and all
I thank You Lord even when I fall
For You stay true through everything
It’s You in who I find hope to sing.
In gratitude I come to pray
For in You and You alone I find my way.
               d.f.a.v. 8-19-14
–Donna

Strolling in my Heart

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Joy walked in my heart this morning
Hope joined the stroll as well
And Love enveloped both of them
Faith held all from the beginning.
Charity made her presence known
Compassion wove in and out
Understanding held out its hand
Pointing out here God’s love was found.
Perfection had departed at last
Weeds discontent and bitterness as well
Human expectations gave up their hold
Jesus’ blood had settled the past.
Songs rang in the air so sweet
Praise replaced a list of complaints
Worship sprang forth so naturally
For here Jesus and I could meet.
                –d.f.a.v.  8-18-14
–Donna

Cottage by the Sea – Confession

Lord, I don’t want to be reminded

That’s why I hid the memory so well

It’s painful –

My cry for help –

No one wanted to hear the truth

Though I tried to tell them

To ask for help,

In so many ways,

Then came the day.

Standing at the water fountain

Swallowing one pill after another

How painful –

Remembering –

Forcing out of the blackness the truth,

My parents so angry to be embarrassed

To have a daughter

Weak in such a way,

I remember the day

My father ranted at me in ICU

While my heart rate spiked

His idea of help,

A disastrous way

Destroying it all that day.

My diary, poetry, short stores, me

Taken and turned to ashes.

It’s painful –

Remembering his “help” –

And later in mandatory counseling

When the therapist

Caught him listening to our session

While I embraced help

He fought it in every way,

Ended it on that day.

Lord, why?

It’s painful —

Struggling without help –

Believing I was weak I hid it

Both the depression and eventually

Getting professional help

Accepting the antidepressants

Clinging to the revealed way,

Fighting darkness every day

Yet I survived –

Help sought for

Even when I hid it

You did it

Saved me from suicide

In many ways

Through many days

Ignorance Lord the enemy

You made me stronger

Than they gave me credit for.

    d.f.a.v. 8/14/14

–Donna

Why is it, Lord?

Dedicated to those who suffer from diagnosed or undiagnosed mental illness.

The famous and the non-famous, regardless of gender, race or any other label.

Those who turn their hurt to make humor to make the world a happier places.

The ones whose hurt we see and can do nothing about.

Those who remind us that, but, “By the grace of God I am what I am…” (1 Corinthians 15:10)

 
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Why is it Lord

That when it comes to mental illness

People still act like ostrich’s with their heads in the sand

More willing to ignore or judge than lend a hand?

If they think it’s scary

To witness someone trapped in depression

Can they not imagine for one small minute or two

The fright the person themselves go through?

Is it the fine line?

Between being one whole person

And being fragmented into more than one “me”

Never knowing which me you will wake to be?

Or the lack of control

With feeling incapable of small things

Like breathing or eating or taking a bath

Much less the larger tasks of new paths?

Why do they see weakness?

Instead of the incredible strength God gives

To keep you from giving up on feeling capable

To get through the darkness because He is able?

Why Lord the arrogance

That it will never be “my” problem

It can only be in someone else’s family or home

Never in your family or in you perhaps alone?

Through history God

Man has been cruel to those

Who are suffering already beyond words description?

Making admittance impossible for the situation?

Why Lord, even the famous

Suffer in silence behind humor and sarcasm

Oh the ones who make us laugh the hardest

Often cry because their hurts are the sharpest.

        d.f.a.v. 8/12/14

–Donna

True Faith, Pure Faith

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Abba Father:
I talk the talk
Recite the verse
Understand some theology
Can sing the doxology
Yet…
I don’t walk the walk
Absorb the verse
Live the theology
Breath the doxology
Because. ..
Talk over walk is easy
Reciting over absorbing heart
Knowledge over living simpler
Singing over investment nimble
Excuses…
Walk requires sacrifice
Absorbing requires wisdom
Living requires commitment
Breathing requires contentment
Possible. ..
Because Christ knows the path
The Spirit embodies the Word
God defines the theology
Only God deserves the doxology
So…
Let my feet remain on Your path
My soul be guided by Your Word
My humanness tamed by theology
Purest praise sung in the doxology
Always.
Amen
               d.f.a.v. 8/12/14
–Donna